Porterhouse Blue (Published in 1974) - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Published in 1974, Porterhouse Blue is one of Tom Sharpe’s finest works. Tom Sharpe of the Wilt Series fame wrote an even more satirical and farcical book than Wilt, namely Porterhouse Blue. This book was made into a TV series, which was adapted by Malcolm Bradbury. The sequel to the novel is Grantchester Grind. However, Porterhouse Blue is a novel with a standalone plot.
Porterhouse Blue is based on a fictional college called Porterhouse in Cambridge. The novel’s central characters include the Porterhouse Head Porter called Skullion, the only research graduate student named Lionel Zipser and the object of his affections, Mrs Biggs, who is his bedder, Sir Godber Evans- the master and his wife, Lady Mary.
The book opens with the death of the present master. In what may be 500 years, for the first time the college faces what they call Porterhouse Blue, which is a situation where the previous master fails to announce the name of his successor before his death. As a result Sir Godber has been named the master of Porterhouse. However, for a college that has been traditionalist to its very core, there are now rumors that the new master and his wife plan to introduce changes.
This is a source of major concern for Skullion and the Fellows. They plan to counter attack the proposals for contraceptive machines, women students and canteen. Meanwhile, the only research graduate student-Lionel voices his fixation on the buxom Mrs Biggs on the megaphone for the hard of hearing Chaplain. Consequently, the whole college hears about it. Mrs Biggs who did not hear this realizes something is fishy when Lionel starts acting awkward around her.
So as to divert his fixations from Mrs Biggs, Lionel is suggested to pick up foreign students. And in his attempts to remove a few condoms from the vending machine, he lands up removing 2 boxes full. What follows is completely bizarre. Afraid he has stolen them, he tries to get rid of them, the best approach according to him being, inflating them with gas and floating them up the chimney!




If the already bizarre situation was not astounding enough for the reader, here’s more! Some of the inflated condoms get stuck in the chimney and the rest float down into the quadrangle! So as to uphold the values of the school, Skullion (who finds the floating condoms!) spends the night bursting each and every one. The same night, Mrs Biggs makes advances on Lionel and lands up in bed with him. Only in the process she lights the gas fire in the chimney, which leads to the stuck inflated condoms catching fire, which leads to an explosion in which they both are killed!
If the reader could stop laughing on such an inexplicable situation, Tom Sharpe then takes the story towards even more astounding heights. The fire brigade are called to put out the fire, but Skullion who was busy bursting inflated condoms, refuses to open the gates for the fire brigade until all the condoms are burst! As a result, he loses his job. After getting fired, he visits the bank and finds out that he has actually been left a large sum of money in the form of shares, by the previous master.
After, some revengeful tactics, he goes to Sir Godber and pleads with him to let him have his job back. But when Sir Godber refuses the two get into a fight, and Sir Godber is fatally injured. Skullion flees from the scene. 2 academics that happen to be in the vicinity see Sir Godber and rush to his aid. Close to dying, Sir Godber whispers just one word - Skullion. And of all the things!!! The 2 academics agree that Sir Godber meant to name Skullion as his successor.
They go to Skullion to tell him the good news. But, guilty conscience, Skullion feels that they are on to him and are going to turn him in. As he is being told the news he suffers from a paralytic stroke. But even so he is named the new master, and his vast fortune is utilized in rebuilding the Tower which was destroyed in the explosion.      
The novel if full of puns and wit, which do not seem superficial but rather integrated into the plot. In typical Tom Sharpe fashion, the book is one long string of hilarious situations which seem completely absurd. An extremely entertaining read, the book is a must for not only Sharpe loyalists but all who feel like having a good hearty laugh. It is to be taken lightly and as a brilliant piece of satire.

The Pirate (published in 1974) - A book about the conflict between jews and arabs

Harold Robbins is one of the prolific writers of the 21st century. Born Harold Rubin, his parents were Russian and Polish immigrants. After dabbling in sugar futures he took up a job in Universal pictures which propelled his interest towards writing. Thus came out “Never love a Stranger” which courted a controversy for its graphic sexual content. Soon Robbins would become a prolific writer churning out innumerable best sellers. He had this knack of mixing up a thriller with sex and historical anecdotes to create a taut mystery. The worlds favorite author, Harold Robins would publish over 20 books which is translated in to 32 languages and estimatedly selling over 750 million copies.
Many of his books were made as successful movies, the very first being “A stone For Danny Fisher” which was adapted as “King Creole” starring Elvis Presley. The stories were also made in to mini series and were part of documentaries. Robbins also lived a jet setting life style with cars, wine and women at his disposal. His decadent life style along with those of the high and mighty of Hollywood is often mirrored in his books. Robbins was one of the authors honored with a star on the Hollywood walk of frame. This prolific writer died of a cardiac arrest at the age of 81 in Palm Springs, California.



The pirate is Baydr Al Fay, the rich globe trotting, prostitute seeking, cocaine snorting millionaire who is given a promise by the prince of an unnamed Arab state that his son would inherit the oil rich kingdom. Baydr so is desperate for a son and therefor divorces his poor Arab wife to hook up with blond bombshell Jordanna who bears him two sons. Baydr is an anti father himself, never looking up his children, abandoning his wives and family for pleasure seeking adventures. Schooled in western thought he is more European than Arab except for his antisemitism. Unknown to him he has a Jewish heritage, being the son of a Jewish resistance fighter. Cut to circa 1930, where Samir Al Fay would meet Ben Ezra in the desert with pregnant wives in tow. Both the wives deliver in the desert storm and Ben gives his son to Samir as his wife dies at child birth. Samir raises Ben Ezra's child as his own and gives him the name Baydr.
Baydr with his money and education makes oil riches, as his personal life spirals. His wife Jordanna also experiments with sex with multiple partners and cocaine snorting and application is the norm of the day. But Baydr's estranged Arab daughter, channelizes her rage in to being a Jihadi and kidnaps her fathers family and hold them to ransom. Baydr is helped by the one counter intelligence officer, Ben Ezra, his real father. Soon its terrorist vanquished, and grand reconciliation takes place which is sort of an anachronism after such a racy life. Well its Harold Robbins at his corny best again. So expect graphic sex scenes, female anatomy descriptions, the big O's and homosexual encounters. The drug usage and other paraphernalia may be too much to bear, but still that’s what makes Robbins the most widely published author. The movie was made in to a film starring Franco Nero and Ann Archer. Keep it away from children please!!!!!

Knock Down (published in 1974) - A novel by Dick Francis - the story of a bloodstock agent

Richard Stanley Francis or Dick Francis was born in Pembrokshire, Wales, England on October 20th 1920. His father was a renowned jockey and Francis was catapulted in to the world of Horses, Jockeys and racing. He dropped out of school to train as a Jockey and was a fighter pilot in the Royal Air-force during World War II. After the war Francis became a celebrity Champion Jockey winning over 350 races. He was the lead Jockey for the Queen Mother. But he had to drop out of Horse racing after a serious fall and became a racing correspondent for Sunday Express. Dick Francis churned out numerous best sellers and most of his books deal with the mysteries in the realm of Horse racing and Jockeys. He wrote more than 40 international best sellers and is the recipient of numerous awards. Being a three time recipient of Mystery writer of America's Edgar Award he was made the Grand master of MWA. He is also the recipient of Britain's Crime Writers Association's Gold Dagger Award for fiction in 1979 and the Cartier Diamond Dagger lifetime achievement award. He also has the Gumshoe award to his credit. He was accorded in CBE in 2000. Dick Francis died in his Caribbean home on February 10, 2010 bringing down the curtains to an illustrious life.
Knock Down is the story of a blood stock trader, well it is not as macabre as it sounds. In the English horsing terminology it is equivalent of a horse trader or the horse buyer. Dick Francis gives another aspect of the English horse racing terminology with the respect of buying and selling horses.



As the writer himself implies, this profession is full of phony traders, bribing and cheating gullible customers, and the hero Jonah Dereham is an exception. An ex-jockey who was grievously injured, Jonah is happy with a small commission and is zealously honest. His goodness and immense knowledge make him the favorite of buyers but "when success could breed envy even in friends, in enemies it could raise spite of Himalayan proportions”. Jonah is a reclusive loner with an alcoholic brother Crispin who in this day and age would never get out of rehab.
Jonah is asked by an American heiress Kerry Sanders to choose a horse for her. After their successful bid for a great horse, two thugs corner Jonah to write over the horse to them. The motives for not bidding, and then at the same time asking to resell the horse intrigues him and Jonah refuses to sell the horse; he is promptly clubbed. Soon a series of run-in happens for various horses and pretty soon Jonah is on the run for his life. But a Dick Francis hero never leaves the scene midway, and Jonah true to the adage determinedly goes against his adversaries.
Jonah suffers threats, harassment, violence against himself and Crispin and knock downs. Amidst all this action he meets Air Traffic Controller Sophie Randolf when his horse bolts across the run way crashing her car. Sophie is suspicious at first and soon falls for the gentleman Jonah and helps him out with his case. Together they solve the mystery about Kerry Sanders, the Horses and the thugs.
A vintage Dick Francis book with an action backed story revolving around the racing fraternity. Knock Down guarantees a good read with a suitable romantic angle to keep the interest. The hero is a likable honest English Gentle man who pursues the villains even when all chips are down. The book I feel is condescending to the American lady but still the slight is forgivable with Jonah's winnable ways. A good book to read, a knockout buy.

The Fan Club (published in 1974) by Irving Wallace

Irving Wallace was born in Chicago, to Jewish parents, Bessie and Alexander Wallace Who had Emigrated from Russia. He completed his studies in California and started out as a journalist at a tender age of 15. He studied creative writing at the Williams Institute in Berkley and from the mid-30s he worked as a free-lance correspondent. In 1941 he married Sylvia Kahn; they had two children. Irving Wallace served in the air force during world war two and later collaborated in several movies as a writer. His first book "Sins of Peter Fleming" did not attract much attention. But his second book influenced by the Kinsey report was a best seller. He has been a prolific churner of best sellers and his books have been adapted as major movies.
How far you would go if you are deeply infatuated with an eminent personality? How far would your obsession and fantasies propel your mind? Would you do murder, kidnapping, extortion and rape and justify your deviant behavior just because you are a fan? This is the questions thrown up by Irwin Wallace in The Fan Club.
The object of affection is Sharon Fields a buxom bombshell whose on screen persona has enamored millions of fans. She portrays the typical sex siren on screen where as off screen she is as reclusive and shy as the girl next door. She may be the dumb blonde on screen but in real life she she is as sharp as the needle.



But her on-screen-avatar has Adam Malone completely bewitched and he feels that he knows her completely. Wallace gives us the low down on his psyche where he fantasizes about Sharon and feels that she would love him if only she could get a chance to know him. He is a complete failure in maintaining a realistic relationship which adds to his desperation. So in the mean time he just dreams about Sharon and collects all information available.
A chance meeting with 3 other men puts forward the motion of sinister events. Kyle Shivley, a crude Vietnam Veteran has no respect and feelings for women. He gets cheap thrills by passing derogatory comments about women and never cares about a relationship. He is cunning, shrewd and cruel. Howard Yost is an insurance salesman whose is bored with his wife, job and life. Boredom pervades every aspect of his life and he indulges in sexual fantasies to get over the monotony. Leo Brunner is a timid accountant who is scared of everything in life. But he never admits to his fear and projects a sense of false bravado and try to impress women. The end result is rejection slip from the opposite sex.
So a chance meeting get these men talking in the bar about Sharon and the regurgitate all the false information planted in the media about Sharon. As the discussion grow more animated they decide to kidnap her to let her know about their love. They feel that she would understand their need and satisfy their lust. So the overt plan is set in to motion by these psycho's. Disguised as exterminators they stalk her, get to know her routine and places she frequents. So on the fateful day Sharon is waylaid in her jogging track, chloroformed and kidnapped. As she regains consciousness she confronts her kidnappers and does not submit to their advances. Adam and Co find that Sharon is nothing like her on screen persona and are pretty discouraged. But Kyle, Leo and Howard rape her with Adam as a mute bystander. But they don't count on the smart Sharon who is devastated but soon plans to escape. Does her captors get their just desserts? Find out in the Fan Club for it is an interesting story out there.

Breakheart pass (published in 1974) - Written by author Alistair Maclean, a western story set in Nevada in the late 19th century

Alistair MacLean is a Scottish writer who specialized in writing thrillers and crime stories. He was third son of a Scottish minister and joined the Royal Navy during the world war two. He was a senior torpedo operator at the height of his career. He was in the thick of the war theater during the world war and saw action on many fronts especially the arctic north. After retiring he started penning his novels based on the war he saw and many of them became best sellers. Maclean never looked back as a writer until his death in 1987.
Breakheart Pass is a fast paced western by MacLean. Alistair Maclean departs from his usual world war two environments to reach the out backs of America. He creates a fast paced thriller involving the US Marshalls and the army. So there is nothing British about this story except for MacLean's language.
The novel is set in the 1870's in Nevada. A train starts its journey from Reese city to Fort Humbolt. The passengers include, the governor Fairchild and his niece Marica, the governors Aide, Reverend Peabody, Dr. Molyneux and an assortment of soldiers commanded by Colonel Claremont and US Marshall Pearce. Pearce is in charge of the prisoner John Deakin who is convicted of de-railing a train loaded with supplies for the army. So he is not a very popular man with the soldiers. Dr. Molyneux is a tropical diseases expert going to help with the cholera outbreak.



The passengers are going to fort Humbolt because of the cholera epidemic which has decimated the camp. They are going to relieve the men and provide medical supplies and food. Marshall Pearce is an honorable man who wrangles a ticket just to get to the fort to check on another outlaw.
As the trains chug along the mountainous ravines they encounter murders, a blizzard and villainous Indians. But MacLeans characters are not what they seem. As the novel picks up pace one by one the passengers start to get killed. They are discovered in boxes, among the coal, hanging outside and every gruesome positions. So who turns out to be the unlikely hero, but the outlaw Deakin. He starts investigating.
Soon as the corpses tumble out they realize that all is not well at the fort and cholera is not to be blamed. Deakin is not really a convict but a criminal investigator with the reverend being his boss. Deakin also has a soft corner for Marica, but in MacLean's true style the romance is for names sake only. After reading MacLean I have come to the conclusion that the hero is a man named John and the love interest is always Marie. Is it coincidence or just plain fixation?
There are lot of twists in the plot and in the end the most honorable man turns out to be the despicable fiend and the least honorable the most respected. This book is adapted in to a movie starring Charles Bronson, Jill Ireland, Ben Johnson and others. The movie is much different form the book, but the pace is fine. So would like to pick up both for the weekend for time-pass.