Vintage stuff (Published in 1982) - Authored by Tom Sharpe - About a teenage boy

The confusions and shortfalls of public schooling, a headmaster with an unusual approach to learning and a dimwitted teenage boy who carries out each and every thing said to him, in the most literal manner- mix all this together with a journey through England and France and what you get is another explosive read from author Tom Sharpe. Vintage Stuff was published in 1982. One of Tom Sharpe’s last few novels before his death in 2013, the novel is in no way less than any of his prior books.
The story of Vintage Stuff is about a teenage boy by the name of Peregrine Roderick Clyde-Brown. He is not just naïve or dimwitted but also a sort of bumbling savage. While the same thing can be said of many other boys his age, what unfortunately makes him stand far apart from his fellow students is his proclivity towards following through on anything said to him. The most innocently said thing is always taken literally by our protagonist.
Obviously, no school wants anything to do with him, especially when he starts folding foliage when he is told to turn over a new leaf!! But after a lot of cajoling, coaxing and heavy amount of bribing his parents successfully manage to get him admission at Groxbourne. Where the faculty feels that Peregrine’s knack for taking the smallest order literally and not having a single individual thought, will make him a promising candidate for the British Army. At Groxbourne, Peregrine meets the unusual headmaster Gladstone, whose teaching methods include lashing among other things.




What follows is true to Tom Sharpe’s style of writing. Gladstone manages to take Peregrine on a mysterious journey which does start in England, but soon crosses borders into France, and lands up exploding with Peregrine storming a French castle. If that wasn’t enough Peregrine does manage some mischief, mayhem and above all a murder within the French castle.
Tom Sharpe out does himself with this novel, especially by displaying a wonderful command over the English language and allowing the readers to truly enjoy all its nuances and innuendos. A boy who takes every order and command, no matter how innocently said, literally. Together with a headmaster who is just a little beyond extreme, the duo manage to stir up enough trouble which results in car crashes, shootings and chaos.
Though the novel feels a bit dated, it is an enjoyable and entertaining read. As always, one can expect larger than life situations, unrealistic characters and a completely insane plot which creates a fast moving witty book full of twists and unexpected surprises. Do not expect it to make sense, but you can expect a delightful play on words, and typical wry British humor which is showcased beautifully through Peregrine’s actions.
Like all of Tom Sharpe’s other books, this one too, is a quick read which will leave you in splits from the word go. If you have read a Sharpe book before, then you know what you are in for; but if you haven’t, then buckle down for complete anarchy.

The Midden (Published in 1996) - Authored by Tom Sharpe - Story of Timothy Bright

Published in 1996, The Midden is written by author Tom Sharpe a year after Grantchester Grind. This standalone novel was published after almost 11 years, since Sharpe’s last release. Like most of his books, Sharpe has focused on victimizing the British upper class in this book as well. There isn’t much sense made in the book, but none the less it is guaranteed to amaze the reader, with all the random twists in the plot.
The story begins with Timothy Bright, a stock broker by profession. But unlike his name, Tim is rather dimwitted. Problems arise when Timothy realizes that his wealthy family has cut him off, making him not so rich. Poor Timothy cannot fathom why he has been cut off, or why his friends no longer speak with him. He dreams about make it large financially. But unfortunately for him, he does not possess any real acumen to follow through on his dream.
He starts by gambling hoping to make some money. But when it fails (badly), he takes to embezzling. While such large crimes go unnoticed, it is his lesser known acts of notoriety which land him in deep trouble. Dumb as he is, he gets involved with some heavy-breathing thugs. His tiny act of sniffing a strangely aromatic tobacco leads to him getting drugged. But that isn’t surprising for a Sharpe novel. What is bizarre is how drugged Timothy lands up naked in the bed of Chief Constable (CC), Sir Arnold Gonders, with the CC’s wife! Sir Arnold is shown to be a rotten piece of work.
As bent as they come, Chief Constable, Sir Arnold has gotten away with charges of perjury and bribery. After finding a naked Timothy Bright in bed with his wife, Sir Arnold is not afraid to tackle Timothy by framing him for various crimes. Most of the novel revolves around his attempts to dispose of Timothy while also having to deal with his crazy wife and her eccentric lesbian lover, Auntie Bea!!




Where he successfully manages to bring up false charges against Timothy, he meets his match in his old adversary, Miss Marjorie Midden of Middenhall, which was popularly known as “The Midden”. When he tries to frame Miss Midden in a police raid of Middenhall, things start to go very wrong. Once the raid is conducted on the crazy residents of Middenhall, by the police who for some reason are dressed as sheep, things begin to blow up, literally. What follows is death and cremation of a dozen police officials and residents, when the entire Middenhall gets burnt to the ground.
As always Tom Sharpe is blunt and crass, and not afraid to create a plot which is not only unrealistic but completely outrageous. With slapstick situations and scathing humor Sharpe has proven to his audience that 3 decades on, and he still hasn’t lost his touch. But while the story was enjoyable, one can argue that there isn’t much need for the vulgar, depraved scenes or the abusive language towards the finale, especially considering it does nothing to aid the plot or characters in any way.
But crude language aside, one has to hand it to Sharpe for creating and introducing characters who have no real attributes, other than to keep the reader guessing as to whether said character is going to get his due or outsmart his creator. The book stays slow and steady until the last 100 odd pages, which is when the shit hits the roof! Ardent Sharpe fans will enjoy the book in spite of the set manner in which it is written. But to someone who has just picked up Sharpe, this book might not be the best way to get acquainted with his writings or his characters.

The Gropes (Published in 2009) - Written by Tom Sharpe - Not as good as some of his others

His second to last book before his death, The Gropes is not one of Tom Sharpe’s best works. Published in 2009, this book is a long way from Sharpe’s easy style of writing where he could effortlessly mash together characters to create insane outcomes. Remembered more for his dangerous mix of women, sexual tension, foreigners, class tension and the powers that be, Sharpe has lost his edge in his later writings, especially this book.
Set in Grope Hall, Northumberland, the ancestral property of a matriarchal family of women who seem to be descendants of a seasick Viking and Ursula, a nun who was said to be so ugly, that rapists and plunderers steered clear of her!! This matriarchal family comprised of women who went out to find themselves husbands. They did so by kidnapping the men and bringing them back to their estate, from where the men couldn’t escape on account of the Spanish fighting bulls guarding the farmlands.
In Grope Hall, the men are bullied and sulk about all day, while the women are strong willed and oversexed! The book follows the crazy life of Vera and Belinda. Vera, who is devoted to romantic novels, lives with her ordinary husband, Horace. But, when Horace stabs their son for being his doppelganger, Vera decides to send her son, Esmond to her brother, Albert. From here on the book begins to spiral out of control.




While Horace manages to escape from the clutches of his wife with the help of a fake passport and tramp steamer headed for Latvia, Esmond is kidnapped and dragged back to Grope Hal by none other than Albert’s wife, Belinda. Bullying aside, it isn’t fun being the Vaseline loving Vera or the Jacuzzi polishing Belinda, who is constantly plotting her husband’s downfall. The only way to establish any semblance of peace or sanity in Grope Hall is if someone attempts to restore the balance between the male and females living there.
Since all the men in Grope Hall believe that silence, fortitude and whisky are their only means of resistance, the mighty task of adjusting the scales is left on the shoulders of poor Esmond, who realizes that all he may need to rectify the situation is steady nerves and good old chauvinism. Like all Sharpe novels, The Gropes also dishes out dark sordid humor through farcical events abundantly.
Unlike the Wilt series and Porterhouse Blue, this book requires many more one-liners to keep the pages turning and the readers interested. While the characters may be unpleasant and the scenes filled with slapstick comedy, the humor in The Gropes feels forced, and the characters somehow feel hollow. Where Sharpe’s characters would seem calm and dignified on the surface only to later reveal a full blown tornado of inner turmoil, which came out because of the circumstances they were forced to face; the characters from this novel lie flat on the pages with no inner conflicts.
With some ridiculously hilarious books under his belt, Sharpe delivered a book which is good, but not absurd to the nth degree. The story builds up only to fizzle out in the end. But like most of his books, it is a short read and keeps the reader focused on the details till the finish. Even though it doesn’t reach a certain “Sharpe” standard the book is an extreme farce with whimsical characters. Not his best work, but none the less the book is definitely a comic, chaotic and wildly amusing read.

Riotous Assembly (Published in 1971) - Authored by Tom Sharpe - Satirical look at South Africa during apartheid

Published in 1971, Riotous Assembly is a novel by Tom Sharpe. A novel which showcases the Apartheid era of South Africa in a satirical and humorous way, Riotous Assembly is about a murder committed by a white woman of her Zulu cook. The murder that has taken place in South Africa at the time of apartheid and the local police who enforce it, is Tom Sharpe’s way of speaking out against the atrocities that were committed at the time. His knowledge on the subject was vast as a result of his staying in South Africa from 1951 until1961.
Tom Sharpe had shifted to South Africa and had worked as a social worker and teacher. The apartheid era inspired him to write 2 novels, and a play, one of the novels being Riotous Assembly. Like every phase of his life, this one too, resulted in the publication of a serious issue in the form of satire and mockery. However, it did not go down well, and he was arrested for sedition, and later deported to London in 1961.
The novel opens in a fictitious town by the name of Piemburg in South Africa. The police chief, Kommandant van Heerden, has risen to his current rank, only because of family connections. His work and merit leave much to be desired. So when this baboon of a Police Chief, who also happens to be pro-apartheid, is told to go an investigate a murder, involving a certain eccentric British lady by the name of Miss Hazlestone, there is bound to be some blow up.




It turns out that Miss Hazlestone has murdered or rather blown to smithereens her Zulu cook with an elephant gun. But since the murder was that of a Zulu and the one committing the crime was a British “white” woman, van Heerden seems it only fair to brush the entire matter under the carpet. However, when Miss Hazlestone divulges the fact that she and her cook were lovers, van Heerden panics. In his endeavors to try and contain the matter, he creates so much confusion that it all blows out of proportion on a nuclear scale.
He attempts to try and control the matter and also stop this news from spreading, by placing the lady, Miss Hazlestone under house arrest, and calls reinforcement to guard her, while he goes to try and make matters “better”. His assistants are stupider than him. When he posts the bloodthirsty but completely senseless Konstable Els as a guard outside Miss Hazlestone’s home with an elephant gun, Els manages to somehow kill over 20 police officers in his over exuberance to guard the house and its secret.
Not sure what to do, Els plants a wallet found nearby at the scene of the crime and then flees. The wallet turns out to be that of Bishop of Barotseland, Miss Hazlestone’s brother. He is then arrested and interrogated in a not so legal way, after which a trial is held and he is sentenced to death by hanging at the ancient gallows for a crime he did not commit.
Not a political novel, and a bit predictable, but yet, as always an entertaining read by Tom Sharpe. The book from the word go, puts light on everything that Sharpe found wrong in Apartheid South Africa. He uses all that and comes up with a story which is hilarious and yet a slap in the face of all racism, savagery, stupidities, juridical perversions and misunderstandings that took place in South Africa.

Grantchester Grind (Published in 1995) - At a college - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Also known as A Porterhouse Chronicle, Grantchester Grind is a sequel of Porterhouse Blue. Released in 1995, the book is written by Tom Sharpe, who has yet again created a hilariously absurd story, which seems to start out simple and blows out of proportion. Born in 1928, and having completed his education at Pembroke College, Cambridge, Tom Sharpe has a good idea of the workings of such institutions and thus how to create a novel which has a ring of authenticity to it.
This book, like its prequel, is also based in a fictitious college, called Porterhouse, which is shown to be not only one of the best colleges in Cambridge, but also one of the most conservative ones. While the first novel, Porterhouse Blue was a standalone book, this novel has used references from the previous one.
The book opens with a simple plot and mostly the same characters as its predecessor, with a few new entries. Skullion, previously, the Head Porter at the College, is now Master, due to a chain of seriously ridiculous events, which have led to him murdering the previous Master, Sir Godber Evans, accidentally of course! However, Skullion too is frail after a stroke. Knowing he might not last very long, the others start to look for someone to replace him, when the time comes, from among the alumni.




Also, the college is in dire financial straits. The solutions to this problem gradually reveal themselves. First solution (laced with complications) comes in the form of Lady Mary, the widow of Sir Evans. She believes her husband was murdered. Though her beliefs and what the staff at Porterhouse wants to believe are two very different things. When she realizes no one is willing to take her seriously, or else is turning a blind eye to her convictions, she decides to plant an agent of hers in the form of a Fellow, by anonymously sending 6 million pounds to the Sir Godber Evans Memorial Fellowship. Her agent has one task only, to find out who killed her husband.
Even though the book is not a mystery novel, all the characters definitely behave that way, what with their vested interests and half-truths. Another financial messiah comes in the form of Edgar Hartang, the leading head of a big American media company, by the name of Transworld Television Productions. But Hartang, like Lady Mary, has some other plans up his sleeve. He wants to create a front for his money laundering business. And unfortunately for the Porterhouse College, they seem to be his most preferred option.
The team of Transworld Television Productions convinces the college to let them shoot a documentary there. And in their over-zealous excitement they damage a part of the chapel, and Porterhouse, demands they pay for the damages, subsequently upsetting Hartang’s money laundering plans. Eventually, an alcoholic by the name of Lord Jeremy Pimpole is appointed as the Master of Porterhouse.
Like Porterhouse Blue, this book too lives up to its reputation. It is funny, witty and full of misunderstandings, drunken admissions, and sexual ideas. In typical Tom Sharpe style, he creates a plot so simple and characters so ordinary, that when he takes them and twists them up, he creates a novel so absurd and out-there that as a reader, it might be easier to assume the events to be true!

Porterhouse Blue (Published in 1974) - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Published in 1974, Porterhouse Blue is one of Tom Sharpe’s finest works. Tom Sharpe of the Wilt Series fame wrote an even more satirical and farcical book than Wilt, namely Porterhouse Blue. This book was made into a TV series, which was adapted by Malcolm Bradbury. The sequel to the novel is Grantchester Grind. However, Porterhouse Blue is a novel with a standalone plot.
Porterhouse Blue is based on a fictional college called Porterhouse in Cambridge. The novel’s central characters include the Porterhouse Head Porter called Skullion, the only research graduate student named Lionel Zipser and the object of his affections, Mrs Biggs, who is his bedder, Sir Godber Evans- the master and his wife, Lady Mary.
The book opens with the death of the present master. In what may be 500 years, for the first time the college faces what they call Porterhouse Blue, which is a situation where the previous master fails to announce the name of his successor before his death. As a result Sir Godber has been named the master of Porterhouse. However, for a college that has been traditionalist to its very core, there are now rumors that the new master and his wife plan to introduce changes.
This is a source of major concern for Skullion and the Fellows. They plan to counter attack the proposals for contraceptive machines, women students and canteen. Meanwhile, the only research graduate student-Lionel voices his fixation on the buxom Mrs Biggs on the megaphone for the hard of hearing Chaplain. Consequently, the whole college hears about it. Mrs Biggs who did not hear this realizes something is fishy when Lionel starts acting awkward around her.
So as to divert his fixations from Mrs Biggs, Lionel is suggested to pick up foreign students. And in his attempts to remove a few condoms from the vending machine, he lands up removing 2 boxes full. What follows is completely bizarre. Afraid he has stolen them, he tries to get rid of them, the best approach according to him being, inflating them with gas and floating them up the chimney!




If the already bizarre situation was not astounding enough for the reader, here’s more! Some of the inflated condoms get stuck in the chimney and the rest float down into the quadrangle! So as to uphold the values of the school, Skullion (who finds the floating condoms!) spends the night bursting each and every one. The same night, Mrs Biggs makes advances on Lionel and lands up in bed with him. Only in the process she lights the gas fire in the chimney, which leads to the stuck inflated condoms catching fire, which leads to an explosion in which they both are killed!
If the reader could stop laughing on such an inexplicable situation, Tom Sharpe then takes the story towards even more astounding heights. The fire brigade are called to put out the fire, but Skullion who was busy bursting inflated condoms, refuses to open the gates for the fire brigade until all the condoms are burst! As a result, he loses his job. After getting fired, he visits the bank and finds out that he has actually been left a large sum of money in the form of shares, by the previous master.
After, some revengeful tactics, he goes to Sir Godber and pleads with him to let him have his job back. But when Sir Godber refuses the two get into a fight, and Sir Godber is fatally injured. Skullion flees from the scene. 2 academics that happen to be in the vicinity see Sir Godber and rush to his aid. Close to dying, Sir Godber whispers just one word - Skullion. And of all the things!!! The 2 academics agree that Sir Godber meant to name Skullion as his successor.
They go to Skullion to tell him the good news. But, guilty conscience, Skullion feels that they are on to him and are going to turn him in. As he is being told the news he suffers from a paralytic stroke. But even so he is named the new master, and his vast fortune is utilized in rebuilding the Tower which was destroyed in the explosion.      
The novel if full of puns and wit, which do not seem superficial but rather integrated into the plot. In typical Tom Sharpe fashion, the book is one long string of hilarious situations which seem completely absurd. An extremely entertaining read, the book is a must for not only Sharpe loyalists but all who feel like having a good hearty laugh. It is to be taken lightly and as a brilliant piece of satire.

The Wilt Inheritance (Published in 2010) - More problems for Wilt - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Written when he was 82 years old, The Wilt Inheritance is author Tom Sharpe’s last book in the Wilt Series. Like its predecessors, this book too has Wilt entangling himself in mind blowing crazy scenarios from which it looks impossible to get out. Not his best work, but the book is quite a laugh, especially for Sharpe loyalists, who will feel a tad nostalgic towards the central character and his antics.
Tom Sharpe died 3 years after the publication of this book, due to complications resulting out of diabetes. He was 85 at the time, and said to be working on an autobiography. A witty and engaging writer, Sharpe did not necessarily move with the times in his books (they seems to be locked in an era of dial telephones and quiet Sundays), but he did attempt it never the less. This book has Wilt showcased in the 21st century.
In the Wilt Inheritance, Wilt is stuck as the nominal Head of the Communication Department at the Finland University. He is teaching students whom he does not want to teach. But, he can’t afford to lose this job. It’s the money from this uninteresting lack luster job, which is after all paying for the quadruplets private school fees and the maintenance of his wife Eva’s every demand. If all this had not already caused him a headache, his wife decides to sign him up for a summer job.




This summer job entails tutoring the step-son of a wealthy but lusty local aristocrat. His step father has hopes of sending him to Cambridge. However, once Wilt does start tutoring him, he realizes that the boy is not only a complete idiot who probably would not be able to find the bus to go to Cambridge, but also dangerously violent. Wilt learns that the boy owns a gun, which he shoots at any object which is moving, or sometimes not necessarily moving.          
Gradually the situation starts to unravel, and Wilt decides that it is time to use this now deteriorating state of affairs to his advantage. He finds a way in which the current scenario could not only put him at a financial advantage, but also give his snooty wife Eva, some tensions and headaches of her own.
While the book is not his best work, it is still worth a read and quite entertaining. It is amazing how effortlessly Tom Sharpe can develop a believable situation, and then push its boundaries to crazy extremes where it no longer seems believable. The entire scenario, with his amoral horrible little monsters for girls, a wife who seems to have perfected the snooty attitudes of high society, and wilt himself- a constant magnet for all things bad, is unimaginable, yet totally comical.
While the book may not be “hurt your stomach laughing” good, it is fast paced and sharp, with the typical Sharpe dark humor and story line which takes the viewers to place they did not known they wanted to or could visit. Even though the ideologies and prose is somewhat stuck in 1976, it does have a sense of authenticity to it, making its readers sentimental for the books they probably grew up on.

Wilt in Nowhere (Published in 2004) - Wilt traveling - Authored by Tom Sharpe

After a break of more than 2 decades, Tom Sharpe returned with the fourth novel in the Wilt Series. Tom Sharpe acknowledged that the reason for such a prolonged absence in his publication was the lack of poison in his system as it was the period he was forced to give up smoking. Other reasons mentioned by him for the prolonged absence was that the ballpoint pen he used had gone out of production! And that he had even written to his readers to send him their pens!
Whatever the reason be, the introduction to Wilt in Nowhere feels timid and as a reader one worries that Sharpe might have finally gone soft. However, upon further reading it is clear that Sharpe has upped the antics and adventures of the anti-hero of his series, Henry Wilt.
In “Wilt in Nowhere”, there are 2 plots that start of simultaneously after Wilt’s wife receives plane tickets from her Aunt and Uncle who live in Tennessee, for the entire family, to go visit them. Eva, Wilt’s wife, see this as her opportunity to try and worm her way into the will of her Aunt and Uncle, who incidentally have more money than they can spend. However, Wilt tries and eventually succeeds in getting himself out of this trip.
From there on there are two plots. One involving Eva and their quadruplet teenage daughters, who have grown up to be sex starved, foul mouthed kids; and Henry Wilt, who as always takes the poor decision to try and take a walking holiday through London to once again find the romantic and nostalgic side to it. Wilt plans to do that with nothing but his walking shoes and ill advisedly, a bottle of whiskey!    




Meanwhile, Eva is caught in the middle of a drug trafficking racket, with her as the main suspect. This in no way helps her to worm her way into her Aunt and Uncle’s fortunes, on the contrary finds herself further away from it. Her foul mouthed daughters only add to the confusion by leaving behind them a trail of destruction, insanity and angry drug enforcement agents.
Incase everything seems to spiral out of control on Eva’s front, things are no better in England, when Wilt, who was supposedly backpacking is seen drunk and unconscious in the back of an arsonists’ pickup truck. If that isn’t complicated enough, Wilt wakes up in the hospital not sure how he got there, or why he is being accused of arson, robbery and murder! And for all the mess he has gotten himself into, his worst problem then appears in the form of his old friend, Inspector Flint who would only be thrilled to investigate Wilt for all the above mentioned crimes.
A brilliantly funny read, with all the crazy plot elements in place, the book reminds Sharpe’s loyal readers of past misadventures. But, the jokes do feel ever so slightly forced. Known as the king of slapstick, in this novel Sharpe has shown himself as not just that but also someone who is vengeful and wildly amusing in his writings.

Wilt on High (Published in 1984) - More fun with Wilt - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Wilt on High, is the third installment in the Wilt Series written by comic novelist, Tom Sharpe, who made a bawdy and vulgar style of writing into an art form. His writings are quite similar to those of Wodehouse, from whom he took great inspiration. But funny is where the similarity ends. Tom Sharpe takes funny and adds more crass and vulgarity to the story. Even though he started writing comedy only by the age of 43 years, his stories were an instant hit, and found a large loyal reader base.
Wilt on High, follows the exploits of Henry Wilt, a mild mannered teacher, who always gets involved in sticky situations which make for an extremely entertaining read. In this book, Wilt is shown to still be teaching at Fenland Tech. His attempts at drilling English into the minds of plasterers and dozing his way through drab committee meetings is all rudely disrupted when a dark cloud hovers over the college in the form of drug dealing. And invariably like a magnet for bad things, the cloud of suspicion finds its way to Henry Wilt.
Henry Wilt goes about his mundane life, when suddenly a departmental inquiry is conducted. Someone in the department at Fenland Tech is dealing drugs. Wilt’s friends all find themselves resenting Wilt, as they all feel that he is the reason that the department has come under such investigation. Inspector Flint, an old adversary of Wilt, takes charge of this investigation. Seizing the opportunity to try and pin everything on Wilt, Inspector Flint goes about his job with double vigor to leave no stone unturned. Knowing that Wilt is guilty of something, he sets about to try and settles a number of old scores.




Wilt’s wife is of no support to him. Like every wife, she has her doubts about Wilt, and this does not help his cause. To make matters worse, Wilt only complicates matters for himself with his talent for creating new enemies. Wilt’s inborn talent to make people hate him, starts off with an allegation of voyeurism in the ladies staff lavatory, and ends at a showdown at a US airbase, with forces of law and order on both sides, and is Wilt as always, right in the middle of this messy affair!
The book is a constant topsy-turvy journey through oddities. And where Tom Sharpe’s brilliant writing shines through is how all these eccentricities come together to make sense. From situations involving a group called Mothers Against The Bomb, to the set of murderous quadruplets and a thermonuclear war that could be set off all because of the misusage of Spanish Fly, the book is a classic Tom Sharpe novel where things just keep getting worse and as a reader we wait for it to collapse in on itself. Only it doesn’t collapse, it just keeps getting better.
Tom Sharpe is known as P. G. Wodehouse on acid! He has more or less the same comic style of writing, but with loads of vulgarity and crude humor and bold satire. Wodehouse’s influence maybe visible in Sharpe’s plots and settings, but it’s the absurd and completely unbelievable twists and turns in the story that involve the reader.  A thoroughfare of absurd situations which grips the reader to follow the simple yet odd ball character called Henry Wilt.

The Wilt Alternative (Published in 1979) - Terrorism and comedy - Authored by Tom Sharpe

The sequel to Wilt, Tom Sharpe’s second in the series is a continuation of the life and idiosyncrasies that seem to follow Henry Wilt. With satire, which is crude and offensive, Tom Sharpe was quite an acclaimed outspoken novelist. Once you are accustomed to his style of comedy, you might agree with those who feel that Sharpe is one of Britain’s funniest novelists. In the Wilt Series he has put forth a character that he does not seem to like very much himself. Hence, the strange and wrong situations that Henry Wilt, the books protagonist finds himself in often.
In The Wilt Alternative, Henry Wilt is shown to be the Head of the reconstituted Liberal Studies Department at the Fenland College of Arts and Technology. Having assumed power without responsibility, Wilt may no longer be a victim of his own uncontrolled fantasies, but visualizes how he would confront political bigots and bureaucrats.
The nature of his troubles has changed, but he is still faced with inane issues. These issues range from his wife’s over enthusiasm for everything organic and quadruplet daughters who seem to get more horrifying as they grow older, to nostalgia, temporary infatuation with a foreign student and the hostility shown by the medical services that refuse to attend to his most basic needs.
However, these problems seem to pale in comparison, when he becomes the unintentional participant in a terrorist siege. The heap of a house, which Wilt lives in, is all in line with Eva’s alternative organic living lifestyle. But when Eva, rents out the attic flat to a German student, Wilt regrets having laid his eyes on her so late in his life. He moons over her, without realizing that she is a terrorist and that their house is very soon going to become ground zero, when authorities come to try and arrest her.




He is forced to find a way out of this mess, as neither the terrorist nor the authorities know what to do when the Wilt family is caught in the crossfire. Wilt is not only confronted with issues of power, which he must deal with, but also has to resume dialogues with the famous Inspector Flint. In the process he must undergo the indignity of psycho-political profiling and at the same time fight for the liberal values which seem to be threatened by not only international terrorism but also the fancy methods of the police anti-terrorist agents.
Wilt shows great mental ingenuity, which is a result of his innate cowardice, and emerges the hero he is shown to be. Sharpe does a wonderful job to starkly highlight the bitter ironies and social norms present in today’s society. Wilt is shown to have not changed one bit. He still finds women to be horrible terrifying beings. He speaks his mind, even if at times it is just muttering to himself. Through Wilt, Sharpe has depicted albeit unsophisticatedly the absurd irregularities that exist in our societal norms.
While the jokes in the story are at times repeated or absent, and the language used to convey social realities is crude, the book has an absolute ring of authenticity to it. It shows perfectly an era of English history and fashion, which might soon be beyond living memory. Another thing that is truly ingenious about Sharpe’s style of writing is his control over the beat of the plot. As a reader, one keeps waiting for Sharpe to take a bow, after some crazy antic in the story. However, instead of hitting a peak and ending, the story just keeps getting crazier and crazier, making for quite an entertaining read.

Wilt (Published in 1976) - Comedy of errors - Authored by Tom Sharpe

Born in 1928, Thomas Ridley Sharpe was a British novelist, who favoured satire in all his writings. Best known for the Wilt series, and Porterhouse Blue, Thomas Sharpe, better known as Tom Sharpe was an alumnus of Pembroke College, Cambridge. His novels have been well acclaimed globally and the Wilt Series along with a few other books have also been adapted for television.    
Wilt is one of the first critically acclaimed novels of Tom Sharpe. Based on the life and misadventures of a professionally underrated assistant lecturer, Henry Wilt, the book is a comedic novel which was first published in 1976. The story starts off with Henry Wilt, who has a daft job and an extremely domineering wife. Wilt has just been passed up for promotion yet again and is shown to be a guy who always takes the easy way out in life. As a result he never gets what he wants. He teaches literature to uninterested construction workers and thugs at a Community College in the South of England.
Frustrated with his job, Wilt finds no respite even at home. With a wife who is physically larger than him, but emotionally and mentally behaves extremely immature, Wilt is desperate to find a way out of his troubles. Even though he cannot do anything about his job, he loves to walk his dog and fantasize about doing something to his wife, Eva. Eva is shown to be massive, with unpredictable fits of over enthusiasm. Wilt is tired of being hen-pecked and harassed all the time by Eva, and starts day dreaming about killing her in gruesome ways.




But, then a string of unfortunate events put Wilt in an unenviable position. These events start at a party hosted by some “horrible Americans”. When his wife runs off with a college professor, Wilt seizes the opportunity of carrying out some of his more vindictive fantasies. He inflates a life size plastic doll and dresses it up in his wife’s clothes. He then proceeds to dump the doll down a 30 foot hole. And by doing something so stupid he has now started a chain of events in which suspicion and blame soon find their way back to him, when his wife goes missing.
What follows is a hilarious tale of confusion and mayhem. Everything that can go wrong does go wrong. And Wilt only makes matters worse when he attempts to make things better. Along the way he is subjected to humiliation and turmoil as his life is turned upside down. But going through the ordeal, somewhere along the way, Wilt finds his strengths and some amount of dignity.
He seems to be assisting the police in finding his wife, but is almost all the time under a cloud of suspicion from the obstinate police inspector Flint. Gradually with all the pressure of the investigation burdening him down, he starts to find his strong suits and begins to flourish. While the police focus solely on the circumstantial evidence they have, Wilt puts in all he has into showing the world how the Law actually works, and how they can’t seem to differentiate a missing person from a hole in the ground.
A satirical and entertaining read overall, in which Tom Sharpe has created a character, which we can all identify with. Maybe we do not recognize Henry Wilt as ourselves, but, we do recognize him as someone we are afraid to turn into. Throughout the story, the reader experiences a sort of empathy for the protagonist.

Stalky & Co (Published in 1899) - Written by Rudyard Kipling, a collection of short stories

Rudyard Kipling, a Nobel laureate was born in India to a vivacious Alice Kipling and sculptor Painter, John Kipling. His works range from poems, to children's books. Rudyard was a English language writer whose prose is peppered with colloquial usage and languages mainly from India which opens a window to the prevailing culture and customs of the time. His children's stories are the most endured classics of the time and his short stories are the most sought after. Many of his works are deemed to be controversial as the time progressed. Rudyard Kipling was the product of an imperial India where imperialism under Queen Victoria was at its heights. His poems like White Mans Burden are often sited as a clarion call for the imperialist and has been criticized by subsequent humanists. But as an youngest Nobel Prize recipient for English Language, the place for Kipling in human history cannot be discounted and his prose and poems enthuse millions even today.
Stalky and Co is a collection of stories about adolescent boys who are in a boarding school in a quaint town of Westward Ho!. These stories are influenced by the real life boarding school experiences of Kipling and Stalky is inspired from his friend LC Dunsterville and Beetle being the bespectacled avatar of himself. The others include, M'Turk based on George Charles Beresford, Mr King based on William Carr Crofts and the school is based on the United Services College.



Stalky, the type of self-contained boy who smiles at you as he plots your destruction. McTurk, an Irish aristocrat for whom bad aestheticism is the worst crime. And, refreshingly, Beetle, a bespectacled poet. Their deadly combination wreaks havoc on any schoolmaster unwise enough to set himself in opposition to them. The stories trace their many pranks at school including playing with dead cats, brewing beer and smoking like a chimney. These books are typical Kipling works which involves a collection of interconnected stories with a verse of two peppered in between.
Kipling is taken up completely by Stalky whom he describes to be “in black tights and doublet, a black silk half-mask on his forehead, whistling lazily where he lay on top of the piano” compared to the nearsighted Beetle.
At the end of the stories all the mischief and the pranks enable them to be the person they are, patriotic and able to defend the empire far and wide. At the end of their youth they assemble at the castle of a friend who inherits the title to reminisce and drink to their amazing peers who serve in the army.
Kipling's stories may shock many today especially with the over dose of empire praising. It also borders on Antisemitism and racism with the natives almost relegated inferior. But one has to keep the time and philosophies of the time and judge his books. Stalky and Co may not be compared to other boarding school sagas like “Tom Brown School Days” but has a charm on its own.

Plain tales from the hills (published in 1888) - Written by Rudyard Kipling

Rudyard Kipling, a Nobel laureate was born in India to a vivacious Alice Kipling and sculptor Painter, John Kipling. His works range from poems, to children's books. Rudyard was a English language writer whose prose is peppered with colloquial usage and languages mainly from India which opens a window to the prevailing culture and customs of the time. His children's stories are the most endured classics of the time and his short stories are the most sought after. Many of his works are deemed to be controversial as the time progressed. Rudyard Kipling was the product of an imperial India where imperialism under Queen Victoria was at its heights. His poems like "White Mans Burden" are often sited as a clarion call for the imperialist and has been criticized by subsequent humanist. But as one of the youngest Nobel Prize recipient for English Language, the place for Kipling in human history cannot be discounted and his prose and poems enthuse millions even today.
Plain stories from the hills are a collection of short stories penned by Kipling during his stay in India as a journalist. Out of the 40 stories, about 15 to 20 of them were published in the Civil and Military gazette, the paper for which Kipling worked for and the rest were new ones. These stories depict the various facets of life in imperial India, the lives of the natives and the English Sahibs. He often puts up a satirical look on the ways and behavior of the English who treat the natives like untouchables.



Many of the stories are set in Shimla which used to be the summer capital of British India. Most of the Englishmen would shift to the hill station to escape from the heat of the plains. Here the traditions of British India along with the Indian elite produced a different world itself. The stories also are set up among the natives who are portrayed in a simple fashion and in the plains of India.
Here his recurring characters namely Mrs Hauksbee, Policeman Strickland and the Soldiers three appear. The most common refrain of Mrs Hauksbee who cannot suffer stupidity "What fools men are!" starts from this book. The tales include Lispeth,Three and - an Extra, Thrown Away, Miss Youghal's Sais, Yoked with an Unbeliever, False Dawn, The Rescue of Pluffles Cupid's Arrows, The Three Musketeers, "His Chance in Life", Watches of the Night, "The Other Man", Consequences, The Conversion of Aurelian McGoggin, The Taking of Lungtungpen, A Germ-Destroyer, Kidnapped, The Arrest of Lieutenant Golightly, In the House of Suddhoo, His Wedded Wife, The Broken-link Handicap, Beyond the Pale, In Error, A Bank Fraud, Tod's' Amendment, The Daughter of the Regiment, In the Pride of his Youth, Pig, The Rout of the White Hussars, The Bronckhorst Divorce-case, Venus Annodomini, The Bisra of Pooree, A Friend's Friend, The Gate of the Hundred Sorrows, The Madness of Private Ortheris, The Story of Muhammad Din, On the Strength of a Likeness, Wressley of the Foreign Office, By Word of Mouth, To be Filed for Reference
My personal favorite is Miss Youghal's Sais, which tells the story of the class divide. Strickland is a policeman of English Origin who has to mix with the locals and is looked down upon by the English Elite. He meets and falls in love with Youghal, a English girl whose mother forbids the relation. He disappears and disguises as a native and gains employment as her groom. As their love affair continues, a General who is smitten by Youghal's charm flirt with her. This is too much for Strickland who reprimands him. The good natured General forgives him and get them together. Good stories for the soul.

Nicholas Nickleby (published in 1839), written by Charles Dickens

Charles Dickens is more famous for the novels such as Oliver Twist, Great Expectations, David Copperfield, novels that deal with life, with despair, with happy endings after struggle, and so on. At the same time, Charles Dickens is less known for the comedies he wrote, and he wrote a fair number of them such as "The Pickwick Papers" (his first novel), and "The Life and Adventures of Nicholas Nickleby". The book, like his other books, was presented in serial form through 1838 and 1839, in a total of 19 serial releases (the length of each serial release was 32 pages). This book, although not so widely know as his other books, has received a fair amount of praise, and has been used for different adaptations for film, the stage, and for television multiple times. As for criticism, the book has a large number of characters, and the criticism of the book develops from the opinion that not sufficient space has been given by Dickens to develop the story of these characters.
The novel was written during the time that Dickens was writing Oliver Twist, and showed that there was a reversion back to comedy in the form of this novel.



The novel carries on with Dickens quest against social injustice of the British society of that time, and shows specifically the injustice against boys at a all-boys boarding school run by Wackford Squeers (and as mentioned by Dickens, this behavior seemed so realistic that Dickens was threatened by legal action by many people running boarding schools who felt that Dickens was portraying their boarding schools).
The story is about Nicholas Nickleby, an impulsive and given to anger young man, whose father died leaving the family penniless and leaving Nicholas responsible for his mother and sister. He has a rich uncle, Ralph, but Ralph does not like Nicholas, although he has a soft corner for Kate, the sister of Nicholas. Given that Ralph feels some responsibility for the family, he gets employment for Nicholas and Kate in other that they can support the family; and Nicholas gets employment at a Yorkshire boarding school for poor boys called "Dotheboys Hall" run by Wackford Squeers where the boys are badly mistreated, and Nicholas retaliates against this treatment.

Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut, published in 1963

Kurt Vonnegut wrote a number of books that were satire, and were insightful comments into human behavior; he used to weave in the areas that caused the strongest of human emotions such as organized religion, different brands of politics, and the quest to run our daily lives. The name of the book, Cat's Cradle, is derived from a string game (played with strings manipulated by the fingers of both hands), and is used because the fictional character of one of the leading scientists, Felix Hoenikker (a fictional character, and a leading scientist, who played a key role in the creation of the atom bomb) was playing Cat's Cradle when the atom bomb was first used. Felix was a hard nosed scientist who did not care about what his inventions would do, and was indifferent on the uses of his invention. This attitude in the book was based on the real life experiences of Vonnegut, who used to interview scientists from GE as part of an effort to generate some good stories from the research work ongoing.



The primary character of the novel is a man called Jonah, who wants to write a book that details what some important Americans were doing on the day that a nuclear bomb was used, on the Japanese city of Hiroshima. During his research, he gets acquainted with the family of Felix Hoenikker, Nobel award winning physicist who was involved in the creation of the atom bomb. Jonah soon learns of another creation of the scientist, a chemical called ice-nine, a pretty dangerous material that freezes water even at room temperature, and can do so even if it is one crystal of the material coming into contact with a huge amount of water.
Soon, Jonah is on his way to a Carribean island of San Lorenzo, a very poor island that is ruled by a dictator, "Papa" Monzano. San Lorenzo has a religion called Bokononism, which is very popular in the island, and is a new type of religion, combining peaceful rituals with a nihilistic thoughts about humanity and God's role. Soon, a series of events occur in which Jonah is handed over the Presidency of the island, and ice-nine causes first the death of the ailing dictator, and then a freak accident causes the freezing of the entire water of the earth's oceans and seas, causing mass deaths. It is then revealed that the book is a memoir written by Jonah.

The Sirens of Titan by author Kurt Vonnegut, Jr, (1959)

The Sirens of Titan was a novel that was nominated for a Hugo Award, published in 1959. It is acknowledged to be one of the best books by Kurt Vonnegut, even though he has several other famous books such as Slaughterhouse-Five, Cat's Cradle, and Breakfast of Champions. The book is not actually true science fiction in the mould of books by writers such as Asimov or Arthur C Clarke, more in the lines of satire, a satire on humanity. The book is especially critical of concepts such as religion, treating religion as a concept that can make its followers do weird acts, as well as how these concepts are used as a powerful weapon to influence people, and equally and weirdly, how people allow themselves to be influenced by such use of religion.



This novel was controversial, given its treatment of religion, and churches, and how the fervor of the book was seen to be almost similar to Marxist disdain for religion. At the same time, there are a huge set of fans of Vonnegut, who cannot understand the controversy about the book. The book should be seen as a funny and humorous look at overall society, and this book is indeed pretty funny.
The novel is supposed to be about the richest man on Earth (in the 22nd century), Malachi Constant, who is extremely rich, but whose life is mostly stagnant. In actuality, the novel seeks to portray the entire human existence, its civilization, its development, all this as something that was necessary only to help an inter-galactic traveller. This traveler, called Salo, from a place called Tralfamadorian, is a robot meant to carry a message to another galaxy. However, his ship breaks down, and needs a new part. And this is where the meaning of humanity takes on a different air, since the entire human existence and development was meant for the level of civilization to reach a point where this part can be manufactured and given to Salo.
Constant is actually manipulated by a strange set of events, manipulated by Winston Niles Rumfoord. Rumfoord is a person who knows the past, present and future, and can appear on different planets, primarily because his ship entered a strange phenomenon called 'chrono-synclastic infundibulum', something not defined, but which gives him strange powers.